January 2nd and 3rd

So of course I immediately miss a day, lol. I have a great excuse though, J and I had our first date night in a very long while. The kids went and stayed with my Mom for the first time in a long time. She’s 66 and has smoked most of her life so we’ve been very careful with Covid and her. Especially when the numbers started soaring in WI this Fall. It’s still of course always a risk but I’m praying everything will be good because it did both her and the girls good to spend time with each other.

So, what did we do on this date, we went to an amazing restaurant that practices low capacity and all staff wears masks. I’d been there one other time but J had never been there. It’s on the pricey side so it’s definitely more of a go when we have something to celebrate type of place. We had yet to celebrate our 8th Anniversary back in November so that was our excuse. We were supposed to go on NYE before I started this whole low carb thing, but that ended up not working out so my eating was not perfect yesterday.

The kids actually slept until 8am (Yay!). We all got up and got the kids fed and dressed. I got all their bags packed up and we headed to my Mom’s about 30 minutes away. I ate a banana on the way because I was hungry and it was quick. I figured people don’t usually get fat on bananas so it’d do. Once we got back home from my Mom’s, I got started on the cleaning/organizing. I started with Roo’s room and got all the 6 month clothes pulled out and put into boxes to take to our sitter who just had a baby boy. Got all his 9-12 month stuff put away and his toys organized. While I was doing that, J brought in all the toys that had gotten taken out to the garage after I told Bella, clean your room or I’m taking all your toys except your books. She said go ahead so out they went. Infuriating, but what can you do? I knew I needed some kind of system that wouldn’t let her have everything out at once. My kids really enjoy dumping buckets…someone please tell me they’ll eventually get out of this stage. Anyways, I made some lunch (eggs and bacon) and then off to Walmart I went to buy bins that I could sort the toys into and put on her closet shelf. She can have up to 2 buckets out at time and if she wants another one, she has to clean up what she has out first. By the time I got back, it was almost time to get ready for dinner so I didn’t get much else done.

Dinner was just what we needed. We’re really working on communicating more but with 3 kids 4 and under, one who is in a particularly difficult phase (at least I hope it’s just a phase) and a very needy black lab who barks at us constantly if we try to talk or stand/sit near each other, it’s difficult to do most of the time. We talked all through dinner, laughed, and indulged in crab cake poppers with dijon aioli, filet mignon (topped with asparagus, hollandaise sauce and lump crab meat), yukon gold garlic potatoes, and broccoli. Our waitress had asked if we were celebrating anything and we told her it was a late anniversary celebration so she bought us dessert too. It was the fanciest looking, most delicious salted caramel cheesecake. Sooo good and totally worth not doing perfect on food yesterday. We masked up and went and played a couple games of pool because J very nicely got rid of his pool table so we’d have more room for daycare in the basement.

Today we slept til’ 9:30am and then got up and started working on the girls rooms right away. It took me until 2pm to get them done and then we had to head out to get the kids from Mom’s before the Packer game started. When we got home, the girls LOVED their rooms. They played fairly well together all evening and I made chicken enchilada bowls for dinner and put it over cauliflower rice. The girls were not impressed. Bella tried 2 tiny bites but Milah refused and just ate her berries. J and I both enjoyed it. At bedtime, we tried a new routine that I think worked well. We each took one of the girls and helped them get their toys cleaned up, changed into PJ’s and brushed teeth and them read them books. Each night we’ll switch so we get a little one on one time with them. I spent the rest of the night cleaning the daycare room, living room and kitchen to get ready for daycare to reopen tomorrow.

Anyways, I am off to bed. It’s almost midnight here and 5:45am will come quickly.

Lots of Love~Dawn


I think most of us were probably ready to see 2020 end. There were some great things that happened despite the craptastic year that it was.

1. Ummm, I got an extra 3 months off with my kids. Yes, it sucked moneywise and the only thing that got us through until unemployment (which under normal circumstances, I wouldn’t have qualified for), was the insurance money that J got when his Dad unfortunately passed away about a month before safer at home orders in WI. Other than that, it was absolutely glorious. I’m clearly meant to be a SAHM. Too bad our budget requires me to work.

2. Roo Bear was placed with us. In fact, I’m pretty sure that’s the last time I blogged. He turned 8 months on Christmas Day. The girls adore him. It’s looking like it could go to adoption. We’re praying it does because I don’t even want to know the trauma it would cause to all of us but especially the girls if we had to say goodbye to him.

3. Virtual learning meant that our babysitter is was able to come on as my daycare assistant this year. it’s been fantastic having a helper. Also, her Mom is Bella’s 3k teacher and she has quickly become one of my best friends. We are so alike it’s a little crazy.

The worst part of 2020 was definitely not being able to see my Mom much at all. She was very involved in my kids life so it was hard on all of us for the kids not be able to go stay there once a month or so like they’d been doing most of their lives. They are going over tomorrow to spend the night since we haven’t been by anyone since the 24th. Everyone is excited. Especially this Mama!

No one outside of my family and a few close friends know this but J and I almost split up in April. I had moved the girls and I to our rental house because it was empty. On the 3rd day, I was driving back there after picking them up from our house (they’d spent the night with J) and out of nowhere, I prayed that we wouldn’t get a call for a placement. I don’t know why I did that because we hadn’t gotten a call in over a year, but I did. When we got back to the rental about 30 minutes later, I had an email from the foster coordinator asking us if we would take Roo. It was such a God thing that I called J, we did a lot of discussing ing in a short amount of time and we decided to say yes. We haven’t looked back since. We still had a lot of hard times throughout the summer but things have seemed to start really getting back on track the last month or two.

So now here we are. 2020 is finally over. We’re 19 days away from the greatest day since Obama left office and I’m 50 lbs heavier than I was on my wedding day and 64 lbs away from my goal weight. Therefore, you my lively readers are going to be stuck being my accountability partners. The plan is to blog every night and post pics of what I ate to hold myself accountable. Hopefully I will have the energy to do this each night. I’m doing low carb because I’m hoping this will really help with the ridiculous amount of inflammation I have in my body. Currently, my hands are pretty much constantly numb and in pain and my right thumb doesn’t bend. If it does get forced into a bent position, it is excruciatingly painful. So here we go…

Day 1:

Breakfast was 2 eggs scrambled with broccoli, onions and a little cheese sprinkled in and about 2.5 pieces of bacon by the time I got done sharing with the girls.

Lunch was rotisserie chicken with a little cheese sprinkled in with diced avocado and a little basil pesto mixed in. I came up with it off the cuff and it was really good.

Dinner was chili, no beans with cheese and sour cream on top. Normally I’d put crackers in there too but skipped them. I did forget to take a picture though.

I managed to stay away from snacks and stick to coffee and water for drinks. I feel hungry but that’s not surprising with the amount of crap I’ve put in my body daily. I’m guessing I’ll feel hungry for the first week or so.

I hope you are all doing well! I promise I won’t just post about food but will update you on the kiddos also. For now though, Happy New Year, my Friends! I look forward to being more active on here again and hopefully getting back in touch with many of you from my pre kiddo days when I had this thing called time. 😂

Lots of Love~Dawn


Milah Gracie Lu Running!


2 years and 14 days after she came into our home, we finally got to finalize her adoption!

The last 2 years have been filled with immense joy, immense frustration, immense anxiety but mostly immense love.

WE are so Blessed and Thankful that she will forever be our daughter and Bella’s Sissy.



I can finally freely write about the girls and our life and I am so ecstatic about that.  I really haven’t written much at all because I couldn’t talk about our real life.  I started a new blog about the girls that I can finally link you to.


I hope you follow us over there and I’ll continue to pop in here to write sometimes too.

Have a great week!

Lots of Love~Dawn

Wait for it….

In 14 days, I’m finally going to be free to share some major stuff with you guys. At least if there’s still any of you out there following this blog. For now though, I’ll do one of those fun question/answer getting to know you things. Here’s the questions if you want to play along:

1. Do you make your bed every morning?

2. What was your first car?

3. What two grocery items do you never run out of?

4. At what age did you start doing your laundry?

5. If you could, would you go back to high school?

6. Can you parallel park in under three moves?

7. A job you had which people would be shocked to know you once had?

8. Do you think aliens are real?

9. Can you drive a stick shift?

10. Guilty TV pleasure?

11. Tattoos?

12. If the world ends do you want to be one of survivors?

13. Sweet or salty?

14. Do you enjoy soaking in a nice hot bath?

15. Do you consider yourself a strong person?

16. Something people do that drives you nuts?

17. Do you have any birthmarks?

18. Favorite childhood game?

19. Do you talk to yourself?

20. Do you like doing jigsaw puzzles?

21. Tea or coffee?

22. First thing you remember wanting to be when you grew up?

23. Favorite game now?

1. Do you make your bed every morning?

Nope, but J usually throws the covers up and makes it look halfway decent.

2. What was your first car?

A blue 87′ (I think) Dodge Aries. Ladies, it was freaking loud and I totally think my parents did that on purpose. See, my Dad was a cop in our town but not only did I have to deal with living with one but we also had an officer that lived next door and one across the street. Loud car = all of them knowing when I was coming and going.

3. What 2 grocery items do you never run out of?

Ha…whatever I’m NOT in the mood for. If it’s something I use or want on a regular basis, I’ll have run out of it at some point.

4. At what age did you start doing your own laundry?

I fully admit my Mama spoiled me in this regard. She taught me right before I left for college. However, my Mom is like THE stain master so I still give her the clothes I can’t get stains out of. I’m getting better at stains but I’m nowhere near her expertise.

5. If you could, would you go back to high school?

I would on two conditions. 1.). It’d still be the 90’s because I would not want to be a high schooler in this day and age and 2.) I’d have the wisdom I’ve gained in the almost 25 years it’s been since I graduated.

6. Can you parallel park in under 3 moves?


7. A job you had that people would be shocked to know you once had.

Umm, I got nothing. Waitress, cashier at a grocery store, teacher’s aid in a daycare center, nanny, in home daycare provider.

8. Do you think aliens are real?

I don’t really have an opinion on the subject one way or the other.

9. Can you drive a stick shift?

Sure can! The day I got my learner’s permit my Sister picked me up from school and took me out to the country roads to teach me to drive stick.

10. Guilty TV pleasure?

So we got this smart tv a couple months ago and it has the bi he channels where they place the same show 24/7. I found the Dallas Cowboy Cheerleaders: Making the team and I watch it obsessively even though I’ve seen most of the episodes multiple times. I’ve only seen every episode of Gilmore Girls more times than I can count.

11. Tattoos?

Not yet but have plans to possibly get 2.

12. if the world ends, do you want to be one of the survivors?

Nope, I’d want my whole family just go to heaven together.

13. Sweet or Salty?

Pretty much always sweet.

14. Do you enjoy taking a nice hot bath?

Sure, when I can be bothered with getting all the girls bath toys up and cleaning it out first.

15. Do you consider yourself a strong person?

Hell yeah!

16. Something that people do that drives you nuts?

Slow drivers, loading the dishwasher wrong, not matching the correct top to the sippy cup (can you say OCD much?! Never knew I was til I got married, lol).

17. Do you have any birthmarks?


18. Favorite childhood game?

Ghost in the Graveyard. Uno and jumping rope.

19. Do you talk to yourself?

All the damn time.

20. Do you like doing jigsaw puzzles?

I don’t mind them but I don’t do them either except with the girls.

21. Tea or coffee?

All the coffee but I don’t mind certain teas.

22. First thing you remember wanting to be when you grew up?

I think a teacher.

23. Favorite game now?


I’m still here…

Are any of you?! I just hopped on the WordPress app in what feels like forever and started catching up on the last couple months of blogs. I truly miss reading and writing on my own. I will hopefully get back to at least semi regular posts soon. In the meantime, I have started a new blog but as silly as it sounds, if you want to know what it is, I need you to email me because I can’t post it here. Pdot95@gmail.com

In the meantime, I hope you all are well! I miss you and miss keeping up with you so I will try to do better.

Lots of Love~Dawn

Weary Mama

Hello Friends!

Long time, no posts.  I often think of posting, but because my blog hasn’t been super anonymous and because of what’s happening on my end, I no longer feel comfortable putting it out there for whoever to read and private posts are such a pain.

So, instead, I think what I’m going to do for the time being is post via emailing.  If you would like to get the posts via email, please send me your email address as well as what blog you’re from.  Again, I will probably keep this to those that have been reading for awhile just to be on the safe side and I hope to be able to post to my actual blog again very soon.

Here’s my email address:  pdot95@gmail.com.

Lots of Love~Dawn

Long Overdue Update

Right now, I”m sitting here at 5pm on a Saturday evening, cuddled up with a blanket and our little dog, drinking coffee with a Hallmark movie on in the background.  Rocky is sleeping up in the window and J is just waking from a snooze in the chair next to me after spending all afternoon reffing a basketball tournament.  What you don’t hear right now is the sound of 2 little girls giggling, fighting, whining, or chatting.

Mama took a much needed self care day and Grandma is keeping the girls so J and I can go to a Johnny Cash and June Carter tribute band tonight.  I love my girls something fierce, but I also live for these moments of silence to relax, reconnect and rejuvenate the energy it takes to care for two toddlers 2 and under.

I’ve been having a rough time the last couple of days.  The emotions around waiting for TPR to be filed for M and going through the adoption home study process is getting to me.  Nothing is a sure thing until the TPR happens and the adoption is finalized.  Thinking about life without M in our family and the damage it would do to her and Bella (not to mention J and I and the rest of our families) feels like a crushing weight on my chest and it gets worse with each passing day and week that we wait for things to get rolling.  We thought TPR was going to be filed before Thanksgiving with the hearings before Christmas and here we sit, still waiting.  She’ll be 16 months in a couple of weeks and she’s been with us since she was 2 days old.  It’s harder than you can imagine unless you’ve been here.  We have a home visit with M’s social worker on the 24th so hopefully we’ll get some answers then and we have our 2nd meeting with the adoption social worker on the 25th.

Updates on the girls:

Bella is doing great for the most part.  Her language is really starting to come fast.  Her favorite sentence is “I do it!”.  She repeats almost everything we say and although I still have trouble understanding what she wants sometimes and she still resorts to whining and tantrums more than I would like, we’re working on it.  I’m taking a 6 week class on Tuesday nights called Love and Logic and it’s all about using natural or logical consequences as often as we can but doing it with empathy instead of frustration or anger.  I still yell more than I’d like but it’s getting better and I feel like last week was a much better week than we’ve had in awhile as far as her listening a little better and me yelling a little less.  Yes, I do yell at my beautiful blessing and then I feel a shit ton of guilt for doing it so I’m excited about this new method.  She has her last gymnastics class of the session on Wednesday evening, but we’re signing her right up for the next session so there won’t be a break in weeks for her.  She  doesn’t always stay with the group but she loves doing the bars and her favorite part is jumping on the trampoline and going in the foam block pit at the end of class.  One of our friends bought the girls a balance beam that sits on the floor for Christmas so she practices on that.  She’s got her colors down pat and her favorite color is purple.  We’re working on shapes and counting things with her now.  She is still a climber and a complete spitfire.  Her lack of weight gain is a little concerning.  Dr. G wants to see her again in March to check her weight instead of waiting until she’s 3.  She’s not much of a eater and when she does, except or fruit, she rarely wants healthy things.  We can get her to eat string cheese and eggs once in awhile.  Dr. G suggested smoothies with greek yogurt but she doesn’t like them and I’ve tried them with the young living protein powder too and she’s still not a huge fan.  I’ve also tried pedicure and she wants nothing to do with those.  We’ll see what March brings.  Did I mention in a past post that Bella is in a big girl bed now?  I think I did but not sure.  It happened quite by accident and she was doing great but now she comes into our room pretty much every night and most times, we just pull her into bed with us.  Once in awhile if it’s really early in the night, I’ll try to put her back into her room.

M is doing great.  She’s a fantastic sleep and eater and when we went into urgent care for all of us one weekend, she was 4 oz heavier then Bells.  She says a few words, mama, dada, uh oh, no no, and baby are her big ones.  She’s a very speedy crawler, has stairs down pat, and will walk along furniture and behind toys meant to help with walking but she refuses to stand on her own for more than a second or two and absolutely refuses to try taking a step on her own.  She’s got this machine gun like laugh and she thinks it is hilarious to stand by herself so I feel like she knocks herself down with the vibration of her laugh.  She may not walk yet, but like Bella, she’s a climber.  I had to rearrange the furniture in the living room because she was using the couch to climb on the kitchen counter but then would try to slide off the counter on her belly to the floor like she does from chairs and she’s just not that tall, lol.

Both girls are obsessed with baby shark and will sing and do the actions to it.  Bella even does it in her sleep sometimes.  She’s starting to know the words to other songs too and watching her sing Skidamarinky doo is the cutest thing ever.

J is doing well too.  He has just over a month left of coaching to do and then he’s finally done until September.  I’m so thankful he doesn’t coach a spring sport.

I hope everyone is doing well, and I’m trying to squeeze in reading blog posts when I can because people are having babies and I didn’t even know they were pregnant which puts me a good 9 months behind on reading!

Lots of Love~Dawn


Here we go again!

We’ve sent in the adoption packet for M! Rights still need to be terminated and we still need the home study done and approved so of course, it’s still completely nerve wracking.

Please send prayers and positive thoughts for everyone involved. As beautiful as adoption is, there is loss for 2 parties of the triangle.

Hope you are all well!

Lots of Love~Dawn