mug exchange.

So excited to participate in this mug exchange that Chelsea at Starbucks, Peace, and the Pursuit of a Baby is putting together…here is the info if you would like to participate as well!

Trials Bring Joy

mug exchange

Since April 2013 I have been coordinating different quarterlyish package exchanges for the TTC (trying to conceive) Instagram community. We typically have a theme – lucky socks, stationary, ornaments, local love, nail polish, scarves, favorite things – and it’s SUCH a fun time to put together package for someone who knows about the season you are in. We don’t just cut if off to the people who are struggling to conceive, we welcome women for all phases of infertility (pregnant, adopting, new mom, etc… more details on this below!) I absolutely LOVE how all of these women come together to support one another and spread positive energy and love.

And guess what – it’s time for the next one! Typically I don’t use my blog to spread the word about this, but this time I want to invite bloggers, instagrammers and all of social media to participate (plus have a…

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Let It go

On my way to my Mom’s this morning (30 minute car ride), this came into my head.  What I don’t know, is whether I put it there or God put it there.  And can I really do it?  Can I let go?  I have a cartridge of follistim sitting in my fridge.  I was bawling when my last cycle was cancelled was due to cysts (you can read about it here if you missed that post).  Can I/we really just “let it go”?  We’ve only done 1 IUI since my laparoscopy.  Shouldn’t we give it one more shot at least?  I don’t know, I honestly don’t know.

I turned the music off in the car and I prayed.  I asked God to give us a clear cut sign…ok, I specifically asked for Him to come to both J and I in a dream on the same night and tell us what our next step should be.  I’m not good at deciphering, I need neon signs in my face.  Will I get that?  Again, I don’t know, but I figured it couldn’t hurt to ask.

My spotting was full flow by this morning.  I knew it would be.  I called the clinic and talked to the nurse.  She wanted to know if we wanted to start another injectable cycle and come in for an ultrasound.  I want an ultrasound because I want to know what’s going on with the cysts.  First I said we’d take the cycle off.  She suggested BCP’s to help my ovaries quiet down but I really don’t want to go on them again.  In the end, I ended up scheduling an appt for an u/s on Monday.  She said I can always call and cancel if we decide not to go through with a cycle.  I was at my Mom’s when they called and I haven’t had any chance to talk it over with J yet.

3 of my 4 babies had pretty major runny noses and colds this week and of course I started feeling it last night.  I should have been putting Thieves on my feet all week long but most of the time, I don’t get sick from what the kids have so I didn’t.  And, I’m actually not sure if it’s a cold or fall allergies.  Tonight I’m feeling a little pain in my right ovary so I’m wondering if that cyst is getting ready to burst.  I’m horrible about remembering to do stuff (like rub my oils on) when I’m not in actual pain.  Does anyone else have a hard time forming habits?  I am TERRIBLE at it.  My brain just forgets stuff like that, like all the time!

So yeah, that’s where I am…knowing a whole lot of nothing.  It was beautiful here today so J’s been outside working his butt off all day while I was incredibly lazy and laid in bed from the time I got home from our daycare play date until just a little bit ago.  When he gets back from the car wash and comes in for the night we’ll have to have a conversation about everything.  I’m sure he’ll be thrilled!

Hope everyone is having a Beautiful weekend!



Fact Friday

Fact 1:  159.2….This was, in fact, my weight when I stepped on the scale mid morning.  Now normally I would only way myself first thing in the morning, after I’ve gone to the bathroom and am naked, however, the battery for my heart rate monitor came in the mail and I had to reset the settings so I got on the scale.  I was/am horrified by that number.  I am 5’1 so that is just not a healthy number for me.  My Dad had open heart surgery when he was younger than I am now and I most definitely don’t want to follow in those footsteps.  Working on getting the junk out of the house over the weekend and then it’s time for J and I to start getting healthy.  J is getting dragged along because I have absolutely no willpower so I will eat his junk food if he brings it in the house.

Fact 2:  cd23 and AF arrived this afternoon…WTH…she NEVER has come this early….EVER!!!!  My cycle used to be 26 days long but for probably at least 6 months, it’s been 28 days.  I do not need a new fertility problem, I have enough of them.  I am hoping upon hope that this has something to do with the cysts and that it’s not going to be a new monthly norm.  I haven’t called the clinic yet because it was just spotting at first (and of course, I was really hoping maybe it was implantation), but now it’s a bit heavier and I think it will be full flow by tomorrow.

2 crappy facts this Friday.  On the bright side though, I am having a playdate with my boys from my old daycare tomorrow morning.  We haven’t had one since March so I am so excited to see them tomorrow.  And it’s supposed to be 80 and gorgeous.  🙂  Have a great weekend!!!


Two Great Weekends In A Row….

I don’t remember the last time this happened!

Friday evening I went for a walk with a woman that is becoming a dear friend to me.  We met because of a marriage conference at our Church.  We were sitting right in front of her and her husband and they had about a week old baby with them.  People kept coming up to talk them (we’re fairly new to our Church and it is huge so we don’t know many people there yet) and I heard her say something about a birth Mom.  I didn’t want to be rude and turn around and ask her so I just kind of nudged J.  He knew who her husband was because they had played in the same men’s basketball league although not on the same team.  A week or two later, we went to a meeting because they were starting marriage groups to go with the conference that we had just gone too.  It turned out that they were going to be the leaders for one of the groups in our town so we went over and started talking to them.  They have also been through infertility and have adopted all 3 of their children through the same adoption agency.  That’s how we got hooked up with the one that we will use if we get led to that step.  Anyways, it was just great to walk and talk and hear about how she feels now that she’s on the other side of it (she still doesn’t like to go to baby showers).  She lent me a book called “Hannah’s Hope”.  I haven’t gotten very far in it but I will do a book review when I get it finished.

Saturday morning, J was up and getting things done fairly early.  I was laying in bed watching “The Biggest Loser” and in the middle of it, I jumped out of bed and went and told J I want him to start training me at least 3 days a week.  He is a phy ed and health teacher and also a coach so he knows plenty.  He said, “well, go get changed, we’ll start right now.”  And I spent the rest of the morning hauling and stacking wood.  🙂  Saturday afternoon we spent out on the Mississippi River enjoying one of the last few times, if the not the last time we get on the boat this year.  Saturday evening, Justin’s cousin and his family came over and we grilled out and went to the Village Park to watch “Frozen”.  Unfortunately, we ended up getting rained out but they just came back here and we hung out for quite a while.

Sunday morning, again J was up early (I hate that because I’m a light sleeper and then I get woke up, lol).  He asked my plans for the day and I said I was going to do some changing up in the living room which ultimately led to him doing a project for me.  I made Chili for lunch, we watched the 1st half of the Packer game and I fell asleep for the 2nd half which was probably a good thing or there would have been a lot of yelling, I’m sure.  Then J headed out to hunt and I actually got started on my living room project.  Here’s some before and after pics:


photo-3 photo



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The kiddos have officially taken over the living room!!  Oh, and I’ve totally jinxed myself on the fact that they sleep in the same room and at the same time.  Yeah, no….they now think when I put them in their cribs for nap…it’s social hour!!!  And I mean hour…I already had to move one crib out and this afternoon I had to pull another kiddo out of there because the other 2 were finally sleeping and I didn’t want her to wake them up.  Thank God I have a regular size crib set up in my office that I could put her in.  I need to find some partitions to put in there so they can’t see each other but man are they expensive!!!  Hope you all have a great week!


One Lovely Blog Award pt. 2

First off, I want to Thank Waiting For Baby Bird and While We Wait for nominating me!!  I am humbled and honored that not 1 but 3 bloggers I adore have nominated me for this award.

Here are the rules for the One Lovely Blog Award:

The other criteria for accepting a One Lovely Blog Award are:

  1. List the rules.
  2. Thank your nominator.
  3. List seven (7) facts about yourself.
  4. Nominate 15 other bloggers and let them know you did.
  5. Display the award logo and follow your nominator.


I am going to break the rules a little bit since I just did this the other day.  I know pretty much all the blogs I follow have already been nominated so I’m not going to nominate again.  Just know that I find you all lovely, inspirational and very much a part of my days and what helps keep me strong on this journey.

7 Facts:

1.  I LOVE HGTV and it is the reason, besides the Packer games that I do not want to give up cable.  I also love TLC…but with some of the shows on there, I really think they need to change the name of the channel.

2.  I have 2 Sisters…both technically my half sisters but we have never thought that way.  One of my Sisters has 5 kids and the other has 4.  My oldest nephew just started college and my youngest nephew just started kindergarten.

3.  I LOVE sweets….I usually make chocolate chip cookies when I’m craving the dough, not necessarily the cookie.  It has been said by more than one person that I make the best and softest cookies they’ve ever had.  My dream would be to make a living baking cookies.

4.  I was/am a huge New Kids On The Block fan.  When I was in 8th grade my parents separated for a bit and my Dad got rid of our dog for some dumb reason.  When they let me get a new one I got a lhasa apso and I named him Joey after Joey McIntyre.

5.  I’ve been involved in 5 direct selling businesses but Young Living and Thirty One have by far been my favorites.  I love how both have such integrity and are very focused on God.

6.  Door County, WI is one of my favorite places to go with J.  I found a groupon for a hotel in Sturgeon Bay over Halloween weekend that includes a dinner for 2, a trolley ride to all Sturgeon Bay’s creepiest places, a bonfire with ghost stories, and complimentary breakfast both days with a made to order omelet bar.  Our 2nd Anniversary is that Monday, Nov. 3rd so I’m totally excited for us to be able to get away!

7.  I so badly want to be a runner!  However, I tend to get injured very easily.  It’s so very annoying.  I’m working with a chiropractor to try and get my back strong again.  I was diagnosed with scoliosis in 9th grade, was in a really bad accident in 2005 and then was just recently diagnosed with fibromyalgia.  I think I’m at the point where I can slowly start jogging on the treadmill again.  Fingers crossed it works!  🙂


My Oils are Here, My Oils are Here!!!

So excited!!  I ordered all the oils for the female infertility protocol that I wrote about here, and they have arrived.  I got one of those handy dandy pill containers (only makes me feel slightly older than I am, lol) and have already realized that I should have gotten the bigger one with spots for 3x a day.  Here are the pictures of my vitamins/supplements and oil regimen:

IMG_3293    IMG_3291

So on top of the oils that are listed in that protocol, I also use Progessence Plus (fantastic for any woman for keeping or getting hormones in balance, especially when you start going through menopause…hopefully we are all a long way away from that!) and I also use En-r-gee on my feet every morning to help me run after four 1 yr olds every day.  The bottle of juice on the right is called Ninxgia Red and I take a shot of this each morning.  You can read more about it here.

For supplements I take Flaxseed oil, Fish oil, prenatal with folic acid, vitamin D, Selanium, Young Living’s Super B and detoxyme, and then maca root.  The fish oil and vitamin D were suggested by my chiropractor.  The Super B and detoxyme were on my zyto scan report.  The zyto scan is an awesome tool that Young Living distributors can buy, you hook it up to your computer,  place your hand on it and it tells you what Young Living products your body needs at that time.  I don’t know exactly how it works but it’s amazing.  The first time I did it all the oils and supplements had to do with my menstrual cycle or emotionally, having the confidence to move forward and leave the past in the past.  It was spot on for what was going on in my life at that time.  This time, most of them had to do with weight loss or energy…all things I’ve been needing.  As always, if you have any questions about essential oils, please don’t hesitate to ask!  If I don’t know the answer off hand, I can certainly get the answer.  🙂


A Promise to Myself

My friend at “My Perfect Breakdown” shared this beautiful poem she wrote with us today. I wanted to share it with anyone that isn’t following her yet and suggest that you do. I promise you will love her inspiring and thought provoking words.

My Perfect Breakdown

20140917 - A Promise to Myeslf

I am going to watch the world go by.

I am going to take in every single moment.

Each sound. A child laughing. A bird singing. A squirrel chirping.

Each sight. A majestic sunset. A first snowfall. A daisy blowing in the wind. A dog frolicking in the park.

Each smell. A warm bonfire crackling. A fresh smell of lemon zest filling the air. A coffee pot percolating. A roast roasting.

I will seek to see the happiness through the clouds.

Each and every moment.


I will be an active participant in the world.

I will make a positive contribution with every action I take.

I will live with joy, happiness, and love. I will spread joy. I will spread happiness. I will spread love.

I will leave the world a better place when it’s my turn to go.


I will live by my code of kindness and…

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AMH Results Are In

And Drumroll please…………….1.5

According to the letter (and Dr. Google because of course I had to look it up myself), this is the normal or acceptable range for a  37 yr old woman.

So where does that leave us?  Honestly, I have no idea.  I think we will still pick adoption over trying IVF unless the Lord provides the funds to both without us majorly going into debt.  When I asked J his thoughts when he was home for lunch, he said, “It’s Tuesday after, I don’t want to think about it.”  Or maybe he said talk about it, either way, I’m not getting his thoughts on the subject at this time.  To be fair, he did have to head back to school and deal with middle schoolers and his 7th grade football team has an away game tonight so I probably shouldn’t have even brought it up.  I need to work on my timing, lol.

Do any of you have any thoughts or advice for me on this number?  Any success stories at this number and age?


Best Weekend In A Long Time

Ladies, I just had one of the most fun weekends I’ve had in a long time!

Friday night we just went shopping for birthday presents for the weekend, rented “Son of God” from Redbox, grabbed Culver’s for dinner and went home and relaxed.

Saturday was a hectic but great day!  J left super early to go hunting (first day of bow season here in WI).  I slept in until 9 am, got up, had my coffee and went shopping for an outfit for dinner that night.  I ended up with more than one and spent too much but it was just so nice to be out shopping for clothes and to get some nicer pieces that actually fit…all of my other dresses are too small with the weight I’ve gained (totally my fault…I’m not a lover of veggies and I’m an emotional eater).   From there, I rushed home to get showered.  We headed to a 5 year olds birthday party.  She is the daughter of one of J’s best friends from HS and this is one of the few times of year we know we will get together with them (the other is for the Super Bowl).  His wife always has the fixings for walking tacos and it’s just always a fun time catching up with people.  In fact, we were so busy talking to people that we left half an hour later than planned which put us in a rush to make our next event.

We headed back home to change and get ready for a fun night out with family and friends.  J’s cousin (who is more like a brother and was his Best Man) turned 37 on Sunday so his wife through him a surprise party knowing he wouldn’t expect it for his 37th birthday.  A few people from the family and some of J and his cousin’s good friends from college all met up at the great restaurant and surprised the heck out of him when they walked in.  It was an amazing night of food, drinks, conversation, darts and pool.  It was just what J and I have needed after all the craziness of IF.  In fact, J stayed sober all night so that I could drink (at some point, I may find the courage to share our story).  Here’s a few pics from the night:

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The woman in the pic with me by the fountain is J’s Cousin’s wife…this girl is like a Sister to me.  In fact, she’s more of a Sister to me than my SIL.  She is always supportive of what’s going on and encouraging.  She never pretends to know what we are going through but always lends an ear to listen and gives a shoulder for me to cry on.  Love her so much!

After  getting home late and giving the pup a bit of attention…we headed to bed and had a little spontaneous, non baby making fun (well, I guess we were technically in that window but it’s not what we were thinking about for once).

Sunday was filled with getting stuff done around the house and watching a Packer game I was sure we were going to lose the way it started but ended up winning!  Thank you Lord for an amazing weekend with wonderful people AND a Packer Win!!!

One Lovely Blog Award

I was nominated by My Perfect Breakdown for the “One Lovely Blog Award”.

Thank you so much!!  This is my first blog award I’ve been nominated for and I’m excited to share some more lovely blogs with you all!  🙂




Rules for winning this award are very simple, here they are:

1. Thank the person who has nominated you. Provide a link to his/her blog.
2. List the rules.
3. Include 7 facts about yourself.
4. Nominate 15 other bloggers and let them know that they have been nominated.
5. Display the award logo and follow the blogger who nominated you.

7 Facts about myself:

1.  I’ve been taking care of children since I was 11 years old.  Other than waitressing and working at a grocery store in high school and college, taking care of kids is all I have ever done.

2.  I spent 12 years being a nanny in CT.  10 of those years were for the same family.

3.  My Mom is my Hero!  If I can become half the Mom she is…I’ll be doing good.

4.  I live and breathe the Green Bay Packers during football season.  J laughs at me because I get way fired up during the games.

5.  I have 4 fur babies.  Rocky, our black lab.  Charlie, Lucy and Linus who were all stray cats that I took in when I still lived in CT.

6.  I once peed on my shoes when I was out fishing with my Dad and had to squat behind the truck to go to the bathroom.  It was probably his Favorite story to tell about me.  I still suck at squatting to pee which is why I’m not great at camping, lol.

7.  3 of the greatest Men I knew in my life, all father figures to me, passed away before I met J so my Mom walked me down the aisle with my Dad’s picture on my bouquet.  I would love to do a reading with Theresa Caputo (The Long Island Medium) and hopefully get to hear from at least my Dad.

Now I need to nominate 15 blogs that I find lovely.  This is pretty much every blog I follow…otherwise I wouldn’t follow you, lol.  I know some of you have been nominated already but know that I find you all awesome!  Honestly, I just started this blog to get my feelings about all this stuff out so I think the fact that I have 31 followers at this point is pretty cool.  🙂

Don’t Count Your Eggs

The Barren Librarian

Just Another Infertility Blog

Mine to Command

Journey For My Baby

Life Is One Giant Journey

Dog Mom Chasing The Stork

In Due Time

Where’s My Baby Bear?

No One Asks About My Eggs

Infertile Girl in a Fertile World

Dreaming of Diapers

Journey to Baby Bear


The Almost Mom